"Your day will go the
way the corners of your mouth turn."
Here it comes. I'm sitting down to write now with Ayden dreaming in the slanted late fall evening, and I'm just going to let it flow. I'm not sure exactly what will come out or what I'll type, but I do know this, it will be real. Real life. It's easy in this culture to share, and to over share. And though I don't always like to "air my laundry" per se, I like to be real. I love to meet people who inspire me and hope to inspire others as we all live this life together, and share. Share our ups and downs, share joys and fears. And this space here? While I share stories we've tried and loved and sayings that Ayden proclaims, it's also a place for me to sort thoughts and emotions, to fold them and knead them until something beautiful happens. Until everything mixes together and after some time and some heat, what's pulled out in the end is a delicate balance of hard edges that are made better by a soft and tender center.
So I'm about to share, and mix in thoughts and feelings, and in the end we may have a mess or we may have the perfect loaf to share together. Let's see.
(End of a very long disclaimer.)
It was the perfect setting for the announcement, just before April Fool’s Day the one test I took gleamed with pink lines. Two of them. I cried and I smiled. I felt my stomach and said hello to the little gift of life that I had the privilege to carry. I'd been extremely tired, and now I was so happy to be tired. Car rides made me queasy, and now I welcomed the queasiness. Well, some of it!
I marvel at the beauty of women's bodies, at the way just a seed can bloom into life and grow. How our bodies become nutrient centers and give life to something, to someone, that otherwise couldn't sustain it.
Plans were already being laid. December 2nd, 2012 already had a countdown running with apps on our phones and a check mark on the calendar, and the thought of a winter baby had the corners of my mouth turned up.
We prayed and we rested and we know that this isn't the end, not even close, but rather the beginning of the rest of our story, of our family's story. We're so blessed!
I'm strengthened in knowing that with all of the disappointments in life there are many opportunities for joy and excitement, for fresh starts and new chapters. And though some days may begin with the corners of my mouth turned down, I know it doesn't have to stay that way. All it takes sometimes is a little smile, a small step, the beginnings of a grin... and it grows.
But those are the days where the seed of a contagious, and somewhat sarcastic, smirk turns into something more, and as the corners of my mouth turn up, so does my day.
We are doing beautifully, we are living in sweet peace and our smiles have been jumpstarted by the outpouring of generous texts, calls, gifts, emails and hugs from friends and family.
I feel loved, I feel blessed and deep down I know, this really is in fact the beginning. The beginning of the rest of our story... a new chapter. And I will start it with turning the corners of my mouth up.
Here it comes. I'm sitting down to write now with Ayden dreaming in the slanted late fall evening, and I'm just going to let it flow. I'm not sure exactly what will come out or what I'll type, but I do know this, it will be real. Real life. It's easy in this culture to share, and to over share. And though I don't always like to "air my laundry" per se, I like to be real. I love to meet people who inspire me and hope to inspire others as we all live this life together, and share. Share our ups and downs, share joys and fears. And this space here? While I share stories we've tried and loved and sayings that Ayden proclaims, it's also a place for me to sort thoughts and emotions, to fold them and knead them until something beautiful happens. Until everything mixes together and after some time and some heat, what's pulled out in the end is a delicate balance of hard edges that are made better by a soft and tender center.
So I'm about to share, and mix in thoughts and feelings, and in the end we may have a mess or we may have the perfect loaf to share together. Let's see.
(End of a very long disclaimer.)
It was the perfect setting for the announcement, just before April Fool’s Day the one test I took gleamed with pink lines. Two of them. I cried and I smiled. I felt my stomach and said hello to the little gift of life that I had the privilege to carry. I'd been extremely tired, and now I was so happy to be tired. Car rides made me queasy, and now I welcomed the queasiness. Well, some of it!
I marvel at the beauty of women's bodies, at the way just a seed can bloom into life and grow. How our bodies become nutrient centers and give life to something, to someone, that otherwise couldn't sustain it.
Plans were already being laid. December 2nd, 2012 already had a countdown running with apps on our phones and a check mark on the calendar, and the thought of a winter baby had the corners of my mouth turned up.
We prayed and we rested and we know that this isn't the end, not even close, but rather the beginning of the rest of our story, of our family's story. We're so blessed!
I'm strengthened in knowing that with all of the disappointments in life there are many opportunities for joy and excitement, for fresh starts and new chapters. And though some days may begin with the corners of my mouth turned down, I know it doesn't have to stay that way. All it takes sometimes is a little smile, a small step, the beginnings of a grin... and it grows.
But those are the days where the seed of a contagious, and somewhat sarcastic, smirk turns into something more, and as the corners of my mouth turn up, so does my day.
We are doing beautifully, we are living in sweet peace and our smiles have been jumpstarted by the outpouring of generous texts, calls, gifts, emails and hugs from friends and family.
I feel loved, I feel blessed and deep down I know, this really is in fact the beginning. The beginning of the rest of our story... a new chapter. And I will start it with turning the corners of my mouth up.
Ever sense "The Announcement", our spirits, not only the cornors of our mouths, but our very contenance as been lifted up. December 2nd now maybe earlier like maybe the 25th or 15th!!! Just the thought brings a smile, joy..... Come baby Raegan, not quite yet, but come. We are awaiting your arrival with upturned smiles and uplifted spirits. You have already blessed us.
ReplyDeleteChris, Leah, Ayden, baby Raegan yet to arrive..
You are LOVED Grt Grnds